So, here I am, in the middle of dead week, or rather at the beginning of it. Where do I stand academically you might wonder...Well, all of my classes except two are outstanding. My grades are good and I'm on track. For the other two, things don't look so hot. I'm failing both of them, and if I completely bomb the finals, where will I be? Out on my ass, back at home, and freezing in northwest Indiana. I pray that things do not come to that, hence I am studying like a sonofabitch, but at the same time, the stress level is through the rough, and that tends to put kinks into the machine. I've got meetings with the two professors of those classes to see where I do stand, and how well I have to do in order to at least pass. It's kind of weird, in high school I never had trouble passing a class, hell I graduated number one, but once I got to college, I started accepting the fact that I had to struggle, and settled with getting c's and d's in classes. I never thought I'd be happy to see a d on my grade report, but if that's what I see for these two classes, it'll be the biggest celebration this campus has ever seen. So for anyone that reads this, keep me in your prayers, give me all the support you can, and hope for the best.

So, I've always been told that when you've been knocked off the horse, the hardest part is getting back on. How about this though, why just not knock the horse down and bring him to your level? You might be asking yourself, wow, you're really cynical today, more than usual. Yes, yes I am, you'd be cynical to if you saw that your love life was nothing but a bunch of failures and screw ups. I told myself two years ago after my last relationship ended that it would be a cold day in hell before I started to like another girl, well the devil was throwing snowballs about a week ago, and now he's basking in heat again, because surprise surprise, I've been fucked over by life once again. I know, I should get used to it by now, but I don't want to, I want to think that things will get better, and that I'll be able to look up into the sun and feel happy, but it has yet to happen...Maybe I'm cursed like my sister, she always seems to attract the neurotic assholes, and I guess I attract the bitches that don't want to have anything to do with me, maybe it's because I'm too nice. Maybe if I treat a girl like shit, she'll want to hang around longer...Ladies if you're reading this, help me out here, because I could really use the advice, hell even a date will do. I'm sick of dating, sick of relationships, and sick of all the bullshit. Fuck you all very much, I'm going to bed.